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THE LOST MAN
Copyright © 2003-2010 M. Buck
Growing up in the midwest made Halloween a special time of year. We lived in northern Illinois surrounded by farmland. The full harvest moon graced the October sky and in those days every star could clearly be seen. Evening bon-fires were typical in back lots and kids couldn't wait until October 31st, Halloween. Back then parents didn't need to accompany us and we could enjoy the night by ourselves on our own with no fear at all. I always have and always will love this celebration. I never had fear of ghosts or goblins because I had already been introduced to a spirit, and a kindly one.
Chester appeared when I was 5. There is no memory of any conversation with him, yet after 45 years his name and his presence has not been forgotten. I still think of him often because I'm convinced he was real.
We lived on the Fox River. A century before our home stood, the Fox Indians inhabited the area. The countryside is dotted with burial mounds and many Indian artifacts can be found in specific areas. Although it was never proven, I believe my childhood home was built on such ground. This may have helped to draw Chester to us, or it may have been the reason he seemed to have become held there.
I'm unable to remember his features clearly, but what has been retained in my mind is a tall, slender man, not over 40 years old. He dressed in well worn pants, like overalls, and a long sleeved shirt that looked old-fashioned. Even as a child it was apparent to me he was "out of time, out of place". He wore a hat similar to what you would imagine a pioneer would wear. My instinct has always been that he was probably a coal miner or a pioneer.
His appearances were infrequent, he would suddenly be there very curious about what toys I was playing with and seeming to want to participate but holding back. He always moved gracefully, slowly, and silently so as not to frighten me. He would watch over me for a time then vanish. I have no idea how I learned what his name was. I can't remember conversations yet know we had to have communicated on some level since I always knew his name. No one else could see him although he moved freely around our property and house.
Even back then I could sense he was a harmless soul, and felt his confusion when he found himself crossing paths with a living person. There was nothing but gentleness and kindness emanating from him. While Chester was around there was always a feeling of safety and serenity. But I also sensed his sadness. Maybe for some unknown reason it was his duty to protect me from something during that time. I'll never know why it was he appeared to me. But he was a fixture for a year, although an infrequent visitor.
I do feel he found himself on our level of consciousness by accident while looking for his spirit path. The old powers buried deep in those ancient Indian grounds may have confused him and caused him to lose his way.
I think Chester came across me while he was lost. I'm sure he found the right direction and went on because after a year there were no further visits. Maybe he was only an imaginary friend, but I don't think so. Too many of his feelings were picked up by me as a child. His confusion, sadness, aloneness affected me even then. I have forgotten so many childhood memories, but never this one. As time goes by, what happened 45 years ago seems more real than ever.
Hope you found your way old friend.
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matter compared to what lies within us." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
In Memory of Chester.
Unknown gentle spirit.
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