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FRIGHTBYTES ORACLE


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YOUR PSYCHIC READING

Protective Sanctuary
This is the place to stay when you are in need of a safety zone. As a mirror to the soul, the warrior goes to the sanctuary to reflect and heal the wounds of the battle. You will have a good year except for the fact your only love will leave you, you will file for bankruptcy, and the pet you thought loved you will run away. This is a place to feel the full pain and not to shy away, for there is a lesson here. Meditation on this card should involve the painful things in life and what is to be learned from the anguish. You have the breath of a dead fish. Facing the pain will make you stronger and wiser for the next battle. You will forget to pull up the zipper on your pants.

There may be treachery and deception from both "friends" and enemies and danger from the elements such as fire, flood, electrical shock, kick me signs, or lightning. You may be required to pay too high a price for love which invariably brings with it suffering of some kind (rash, visits from Health Department). Next time try another corner. Had you consulted the Oracle earlier you would have been saved the embarassment of having worn a "Kick Me, I have Hemorrhoids" sign all day long last week.

Your Aura Color
Red: Pure red can mean lots of vitality and activity. Health, energy, strength, sexual potency (you wish), courage, will-power, to conquer fear or laziness. Dark red is anger, resentment, lust, and exploding temper. Light red is connected with waning energy levels. Polka dots are your thing for awhile.

Your Animal Totem
Panther: Reclaiming one's true power, obsession with yarn.
Cycle of Power: Dark of the moon, new moon, winter.

Your Power Stone
Petrified Lumps of Dandruff: Victory, wealth, power.

Your Darker Nature
Fiber Deficient.

Demon Most Likely to Possess You
Imp: Imps are patches of chaos solidified into a servant by powerful demons or magic users. Imps appear as well dressed people with red skin, horns, and cloven hoofs. Imps can have a single alternate shape chosen on their creation, most often a raven, cat, toad, or hamster. Imps are always in telepathic communication with their masters and can control demon kind as if by their master as well as having some control of their own over lesser demons such as Pigheads, Children of the wolf, and Borden’s.

Spell to Vanquish Demon
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust
We imprison you because we must
To spare the innocent, to protect the meek
We reduce your evil power to very weak
Into a prision you must go
Never again to be our foe
(Stick in hamster cage, provide wheel, fresh food and water daily.)

Warning Advice For Events in Your Near Future
1 - Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Nilbog (you're in trouble if you recognize this one), anywhere in Texas where chain saws are sold, the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.

2 - If your car runs out of gas at night on a lonely road, do not go to the nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help. If you think that it is strange you ran out of gas because you thought you had most of a tank, shoot yourself instead. You are going to die anyway, and most likely be eaten.


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Psychic Oracle conjured up 2003